Updated: Oct 19, 2022
The final results of the 2020 election come in, the news broadcast on the results begin "The final votes of the election have just been counted and the winner is...In a surprising turn of events neither Trump or Biden have won! The winner is - anarchy?!"
Suddenly the broadcast is interrupted and Chaos Jester appears on the screen "I see the people of America have finally made their choice. You have rejected the conservatism of the Republicans and the liberalism of Democrats, and instead you have chosen your own path, the path of Chaos. As Anarch, I shall make America a nation of limitless freedom! Now the time has come for the return of the ancient gods, a new Golden Age!"
Meanwhile at the White House, President Trump has just received the news "What do you mean no one won the election?! That's ridiculous!" Trump slams his hand down on the desk "What sort of idiot would vote for anarchy!"
One of Trump's aids shifts nervously and says "Evidently the America people sir."
Trump points his finger at him "You're fired! You're all fired! This campaign was a disaster! Absolute fucking disaster! Losing to Biden is one thing but..." he sits back down and puts his head in his hands as his aids nervously glance at each other "Not only will I be a one term president, but I lost to a fucking write in vote. How will I ever live this down."
Suddenly the building shakes and secret service agents come rushing in "Mr. President we have to leave, Chaos Jester is here."
Trump stares at him "Chaos Jester? Who the fuck is that?" they grab the president and start escorting him out of the room "No time to explain sir, we've got to go."
As they are heading down the hall a commotion is heard ahead, and around the corner comes a group of black cloaked meme warlocks. Taking out knives, they cut themselves and use chaos blood magic. The secret service agents collapse to the ground and proceed to shit themselves to death.
The meme warlocks move to the side, and Chaos Jester comes walking down the hall towards Trump.
"At last we meet President Trump or should I say ex-president. It would appear you're no longer needed. This is no longer a democracy, we anarchy now." he holds out his hand towards Trump "I banish you to the remote Amazon, no one there knows of the Trump."
screaming "Noooo!" Trump slowly vanishes.
Suddenly the room starts shaking violently and a massive earthquake strikes, before being followed by a massive explosion and huge fireball. The house slowly collapses, explosions are everywhere.
Chaos Jester smiles "Ah there's nothing like the beauty of an apocalyptic fire! Finally, this concludes my glorious campaign to help America learn about chaos magic and embrace anarchy."
Some years later, at the former White House, now know as the Purple House. Purpy is seen sitting in a chair reading a newspaper, it reads "Former president Trump becomes chief of remote Amazon tribe, promising to Make the Amazon Great Again. They have started painting themselves orange in honor of their new leader."
Purpy chuckles and says "About time someone brought conservatism to them."
"Bring me some ice cream, Joe." Chaos Jester says.
"Right away sir!" Biden says as he hurries to grab an ice cream cone from the freezer.
He hands it to Chaos Jester who then walks up to the window while eating it "We did it Purpy! We saved America and created a world of absolute freedom!"
Outside the window can be seen a landscape overgrown with vegetation, Iron Age cities, Corona demons flying in the sky, and piles of corpses next to a blood drenched sacrificial altar.
"The new world is beautiful, isn't it?" he says as he finishes the ice cream cone and chases it with a sip of hot chocolate "Freedom never tasted so good!"